Dear Life

Dear Life,

 

I am writing to tell you to go Fuck yourself. I am sick of the bad news and everything that you have brought to my family in 2013. I am ready to see this year go and ask that you post pone any crappy things you have in store for 2014.

This year life has brought my family the news that my baby sister has cervical cancer. Like I said F you. She is 25, yes I know it was caught early and she is responding to treatment but seriously was that really needed this year? Right after the love of her life destroyed her? We, as a family, have spent the last 10 months picking up the pieces that were shattered. I have held her hair back as she drank herself sick, I have sat on the phone with her for hours telling her she is perfect and he is the one who is in the wrong. This has started to get better, only for life to hit our family again.

Three weeks ago my mom was out-of-town for business. She was in the elevator going up to her apartment and she passed out. No one was around so there was no one to catch her. When she came to she had banged up her nose, her face, knees, and hands. She fell onto the marble floor of the elevator. She did not go to the ER, instead she finished out her work week in Puerto Rico and flew home the following Friday. She finally got into the doctor two weeks after the fall. Her doctor sent her for CT scans of the brain, facial bones, and neck. They were ordered Stat.  I called her Wed to see if she got the results, no answer from my mom. Finally she and I talked yesterday afternoon around 3:30 in the afternoon. I was really confused, my mom works until at least 6 every night.

You see life you decided to kick me as I was just getting back on my feet. My mom told me that they found a growth on her brain. I couldn’t understand what she was saying, it wouldn’t process. Then she said it again, the neurologist told her she had a benign tumor growing. With tears rolling down my face I hit the floor. My knees gave out and somehow I was sitting on the floor when I had just been standing.

 

Here’s the thing life, I know it’s benign I understand that it is not cancer but there is only one way to take out a tumor … it’s called brain surgery. That in itself carries its own risks. So life, you can take 2013 and shove it up your ass. My mom is my best friend, and while we do not always see eye to eye on things and fight … I’ll be damned if you are going to kick me any more.

I’m still working through what you have brought my family this year, and I’m not sure I’m going to be okay until everything is said and done. This includes my dad having to have yet another surgery to replace his pacemaker next month.

While you have kicked me while  I am down, I will not let this take the light out of my day. I will continue to pray and know that everything will be okay in God’s hands.

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